Wonderments

I had a really good and productive day yesterday, writing a story in which my main character, Jessica, finds out she has a brother. Not so far from my own life, I know. I decided, with help from Buzz, that it would be easier to write my own story through they eyes of someone else. I can agree now that it was a good idea. I've had to change some things of course, so it's not all true. Just based on the true story. I've decided to enter that first chapter into a competition because it can stand alone as a short story. I really want to continue writing it once I find out some more though. I'm hoping I can get a really good story out of it. 

Today, however, I am not feeling productive nor do I have the inclination to do anything at all. I feel quite sick, and can't even pay attention to Top Gear, which is playing on Buzz's laptop.  I know that I'm quite worried about the year abroad, but the amount of worry I'm holding over the whole Matthew situation is not doing me any good at all. I can't help but wonder if he saw the picture and thought, nopes - don't want anything to do with her. Alternatively, it could be the fault of the post. Or he's just busy/scared to write back. I genuinely don't know, and I wish I did.

I wish that I wasn't getting so worked up over things lately. Maybe I wouldn't be so worked up if I'd have actually saved my money. =/ Dunno how to survive this coming year. I've had some good chats with friends, but I still don't feel 100% better about anything. At least I know they'll be with my every step of the way, on the Internet at least!

Ciao x